Comfort Zones

Comfort Zones.

What does yours look like? What does it have in it? I’ll show you mine first.

grave yard
Photo by Anton Darius on Unsplash

Yes, it’s a grave yard. Why? Because my comfort zone, as it’s most often used, is where my dreams / goals / aspirations go to die. Seriously. Grim, I know, but ultimately, inside my comfort zone I am lethargic. I sit and watch YouTube videos, listen mindlessly to whatever numbing nonsense is playing on the television. Key words here are, “sit”, “mindlessly”, and “numbing”.

Inside my comfort zone are the clothes that are comfortable AND unassuming; the go-to food choices / restaurants; the unconscious habits and routines that while they keep me alive, they don’t allow me to LIVE.

The only active thing I do inside my comfort zone is hide. I hide from most feelings and emotions (feelings being what I feel, emotions being the demonstrations of those feelings), from situations where I have to stand in my light and shine on others who may take offense. And let me tell you, hiding does NOT burn any calories or stop the pain in my joints (soul) from happening.

I bet you’re sitting in your comfort zone right now. Yes, comfort zones are mobile thanks to the modern cell phone, wireless ear buds and headsets, Kindles, and tablets. You may be ‘connecting’ via your social media platforms, but is that connection bringing your deep desires any closer to fruition?

I stepped quite a bit outside my comfort zone the first weekend of this month. Perhaps you read the post? If not, here it is. Check it out, I’ll wait.

Okay, so yeah, I did that. Let me point out all the steps I took OUTSIDE my comfort zone to get to that point:

1. Comfort zone does not allow for aggressive driving when on unfamiliar streets. New York City is big, crowded, and wildly unfamiliar to me.
Steps Taken – I chose to drive the hub’s F-150 through the Lincoln Tunnel from the Air BnB we stayed in, in New Jersey (also big, crowded, and unfamiliar) into Manhattan, instead of taking public transportation.

2. Comfort zone does not allow for assertive behavior in most situations.
Steps Taken – Navigated around the general area of the convention center without the GPS. Attempted parking in three tiny, underground lots before finally finding one that could accommodate the truck. Convinced the parking attendant that yes, the truck would NOT be in the way if he just parked it right there in the corner. Walked, alone, the 14 blocks back to the event venue making eye contact with passer-bys, speaking when spoken to, offering a head nod and smile otherwise

3. Comfort zone does not allow for the initiation of friendly banter or the baring of one’s vulnerabilities with strangers and or, in public.
Steps Taken – Accepted every invitation for conversation or a hug from anyone in the crowd while waiting for the event to open; once inside, made it a point to be friendly to the women around me; at lunch, initiated a couple of conversations; offered up my honest feelings, fears, etc. when asked. And then, I did the thing

I’ve taken steps outside my comfort zone on and off throughout the years but this last one did something to me. I’ve seen my “promised land” and I’m thinking of finally making that move.

“Okay, for real, this is getting weird. What does this have to do with the last post?”

“I have no idea, but now, I’m kinda curious to see how she ties it together.”

(*smiles* – they’re so not ready)

 

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